ROSLIN-THOMASBURG PASTORAL CHARGE
July 26 2015: Ninth Sunday after Pentecost
2 Samuel 11:1-15; Psalm 14; Ephesians 3:14-21; John 6:1-21

Today we are going to consider, in way that I hope  you find somewhat humorous, something that affects us all, every man, woman and child, no matter our background – temptation.

Are you tired of your relatively peace filled lives?  Have you ever wondered when you’ll get your fifteen minutes of fame?  Have you ever stood back as someone’s, up to now, secret life has been made very public and you wondered “How could they ever get into such a mess?”  Have you ever longed to be as well-known as the most infamous crook, backstabber, adulterer, defrauder or swindler?  Have you ever dreamed of being the only topic of conversation among your ex-relatives and ex-friends? Well, I have good news.

This morning, I will reveal an actual, real life case study that details, very clearly how to turn your life into a complete and utter train wreck in three easy steps.  And I am so confident that these three easy steps are so truly effective in destroying lives, if you begin applying these three steps today and your life isn’t well on its way to falling apart within thirty days, I will give you your money back three times over.

Now, about the case study:  I won’t need to send you a copy or try to figure out how to get around copyright infringements.  It’s in all of your homes.  So, if you need to refer back to ensure that you stay on track, just open your Bible to the passage we just read: 2 Samuel 11:1-15

The first step is to relish in distractions.

Temptations don’t really start as temptations.  Most often they are simply a distraction, a thought that passes through our minds, something we catch a glimpse of or perhaps something we hear, but once we take notice of them, they can very quickly become a temptation.

Now, if you fill your thoughts and activities with the things you should be doing, you’re not so prone to even notice the constant stream of distractions that come at your way  on a daily basis, let alone have the time to relish them.

David demonstrates for us how to maximize possibilities.  His army is away fighting a war against the Ammonites and having destroyed the Ammonite army all that is left is the city of Rabbah.  His army is away from home in another land fighting a war.  His soldiers are being injured and killed, living in the fields that surround that city and exposed to the rain and still cold nights.  But, where is David, – at home taking a nap.  In other words, he is goofing off!  Rather than being where he should have been, doing what he should have been doing.  He is not really doing anything.

You see, when our days and our minds are filled with empty space, we are opening ourselves to the maximum exposer to distractions and we have the time to take seriously the opportunity to relish in them.  When David gets up from his nap, he takes a leisurely stroll on his roof taking in the sights and sound of Jerusalem.  And does he get an eyeful.  The beautiful Bathsheba is taking a bath and David likes what he sees.

So, what do I mean when I say “relish”?  We set our minds on thinking about what it would be like to experience the reality of the fantasies we begin nurturing.  We savour the possibilities.  And you know, really it doesn’t matter if we spend all our time thinking about doing something or not doing something we are still relishing it.  That’s why it is so important to get all those pesky notions of what we should be doing out of our heads.  Before you know it, what started as a fleeting distraction will capture your attention and become a full-fledged temptation.

But relishing a distraction or by now temptation, goes beyond simply thinking about whatever to actually experience something.  We also need to begin to make plans as to how this thing could come about.

Now, don’t worry because it will come naturally.  No real effort just time on your hands and a temptation in your mind.  Before you know it, fantasizing what fulfilling a fantasy would be like will turn into making plans to turning that fantasy into a reality.

You’ll notice from the case study how David starts his afternoon taking a nap, then goes for a leisurely stroll, begins gawking at his neighbour and then sends someone to find out who this beauty is.  And before you know it, he is sending for her.

Now, David was a king and was quite accustomed to making quick decisions and getting what he wanted when he wanted so don’t get discouraged if it takes you a little longer to work through this same process.  Remember, practice makes perfect!

I have just alluded to the second step of these three easy steps toward wrecking your life.  At some point you have stop relishing in those distractions and take concrete actions to make your temptations a reality.  In David’s case, he had his men bring Bathsheba to him.

At this point, I think it best to consider strategy.  If you want to excel at making a total wreck out of your life so that it will not be just a few of your inner circle that will be talking about you behind your back and even perhaps in front of you as well, you need to develop both the scope and the duration of your escapade.  In other words, you need to involve as many people as possible and you need to ensure enough time passes so that your escapade will affect as many as possible.  It isn’t sufficient to wreck only your life; you need to destroy as many other lives as possible.  So you need to be careful who you involve in your scheme.  Only use those people over whom you have some leverage.

For some, your up-to-now stellar reputation may be enough.  Let’s face it, David was the sweetheart of Israel from the time he came on the scene and did away with the pesky Goliath.  No one would have questioned his motives.  Perhaps, you could use someone in your employ and threaten them with termination as would have been assumed by the members of David’s guard.  Perhaps there is someone about whom you have some compromising information that they would rather take to their grave than have made public.  Perhaps you can use the threat of removing them from you will, if your estate looks like it might be substantial or you can offer someone a reward that only you can offer for keeping their mouth shut and doing what they are told without question.

If you are concerned that you will not be able to such things – don’t worry about it.  Fantasize some more.  Before you know it your desire to complete your task will outweigh any other concerns.  Your conscience doesn’t stand a chance.

Look at David.  Not only did he want this woman so bad that he threw caution to the wind and had her way with her but he did so at the worst possible time.  Given that it seemed to be common knowledge that she had just completed her “purification rites” which took place seven days after her menstrual period was completed, meaning she would have been the absolute best time for conceiving a child, there is a good chance that he knew her getting pregnant was almost inevitable.  Ah, the added thrill of being caught read handed!

Once David was informed that, in deed, Bathsheba was carrying his child, David fully embraced the third easy step in wrecking his life – deny any responsibility, regardless of what you have to do.  Most of us would lie, cheat, steal, manipulate or perhaps even blackmail, but eventually David pushes beyond the mundane and commits murder.

Now, to be fair, David did try the easy way out by recalling Uriah from the front lines hoping while he was back in town he’d take the opportunity to mess around with his wife.  But he didn’t so David got Uriah to stay a second night and got him drunk thinking that with his guard down, Uriah would slip home rather than again sleep with the palace servants.  But Uriah, unfortunately, was a man of principal and refused the comforts of home while his fellow soldiers we in the field fighting and dying.  Having what was obviously no other choice; David resorted to that old standby, “better him than me.”  Had David come clean, he and Bathsheba both would have been subject to execution by stoning for the capital crime of adultery.

So, if David were to take responsibility for his actions two would die even though Bathsheba may have been quite innocent of anything other than not having any choice in her roll in the hay with the king.  If Uriah dies, only one person suffers.  Ya, right!

David writes a note to his general, Joab, seals it and gives it to Uriah to take back to the front.  Isn’t it ironic that Uriah carries with him his own death warrant and the reason he will die is because his conduct was far more regal than was David’s.

Joab does as ordered, sets Uriah in the front lines of the worst of the battle and then orders a retreat and that’s the end of Uriah, a couple other of David’s best soldiers, David’s reputation with Joab and how many others?  And David gets to add another woman to his stable, even if he really didn’t want her hanging around to be a constant reminder of the depths of his stupidity.  David is excelling at making his life a total train wreck.

The subject of temptation reminds me of the story of the women who read an ad in the local newspaper: “Purebred Police Dog $25.”

Thinking that to be a great bargain, she ordered the dog to be delivered. The next day a van pulled up and left her the scruffiest, mangiest-looking mongrel she had ever seen.

In a rage, she telephoned the man who had placed the ad. “What do you mean by calling that mangy mutt a purebred police dog?”

“Don’t be deceived by his looks, Ma’am,” the man replied. “He’s in the Secret Service.”

Of course, the difference is that when it comes to temptation we are both the buyer and the seller.  We are deluding ourselves.

So, once again, here are the three easy steps to making a wreck out of your life: 1) relish in distractions; 2) make your fantasies come true; and 3) never take responsibility for your actions.

I guess I should add here that as the story continues, David is confronted by Nathan the prophet and eventually does take responsibility for his actions and repents before God.  And even though David’s relationship with God is restored his indiscretion haunts him for the rest of his life.  From this point on, his life is never the same.  Trouble seems to follow him everywhere he goes.  What goes around, comes around.

To think, David would never have experienced the opportunities to abuse his power, manipulate his closest friends and allies, betray the trust of those devoted to him, commit murder, say good-bye to his life of relative peace and suffer for the rest of his life had he just been where he should have been, doing what he should have been doing – leading his troops in battle.  Failing that, had he just looked away rather than gawking at Bathsheba like a kid in a candy store, he would have continued to be the man he had always been up to that time.  Had he just turned his thoughts toward God rather than relishing in his distractions, the man who was such a strong example of what it means to live a godly life that the common notions of what the Messiah would be like were based on him, would never have become the classic example of how to take one’s life and turn it into a complete and utter train wreck.

Prayer:  God who loves us beyond measure, who works in us to give us lives that are filled with the peace that only you can give, who knows best what will bring us the greatest joy, forgive us when we allow ourselves to relish in any of the many temptations that come our way.  Remind us that often it is something very small, a passing scene, a thought, an expression on a face, an innuendo in someone’s words or a short lived possibility of circumstances that can lead us down the path of destruction.  Remind us that the best way to avoid distractions is to fill our thoughts and activities with those things we should be doing and the best way to deal with temptation is to turn our thoughts towards you and to relish in your love for us.  Remind us that when we yield to temptation, we are not just harming ourselves but often we are bringing harm to those we love the most and that love us.  And finally, remind us that when we are foolish, when we do not turn our thoughts toward you and instead begin the journey down the path, even then we are not beyond your love.  Help us be honest with ourselves and with you.  Amen .